Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
