omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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