I only kidnapped one of them. chill
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
