i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
