happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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