sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
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