Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
The cops high fived after they tackled you
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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