do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
