Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize
