And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
