I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
