your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
He kissed a someone with a penis
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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