i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
