i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
