she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
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