and next time when you feel me up, do it right
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
