wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
