is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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