They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
How does one acquire holy water?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
