Umm I'm too high to move.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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