If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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