y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
