once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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