Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize
