ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize
