Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
