My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
