bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize