This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
