why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
