the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
why do cheetos always look like penises
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
