Are we in a gay sports bar?
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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