this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
