Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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