I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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