No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize