Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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