How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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