Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
When are your genitals available?
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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