Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
We got so high we made milksteak
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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