So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
