I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
