Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
