I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
