we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
You had me at "let me see your balls"
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
