It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Randomize
