Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
