i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
