he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Enjoy the penises
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
