I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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