we have pet lesbian snakes
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
